Where should I begin....

Dear bloggers,

I forgot the last time I've posted anything.(sigh) I don't know where to begin, hehe. Let's go back to the time I was still in UPSI. During the last few weeks in UPsi,life was hard, I guess everyone was nervous and feeling scared of going to the last stage in becoming a teacher.. TEACHING PRACTICE..feeling tense even in our rented apartment. Nobody really talked to each other as much as we did before. I guess that was it, the phase that we had to go through..It;s through and I think, all of us moved on.

At the moment, I am just a month away to finishing my teaching practice here in Seremban, N9 and at this very minute, I can't put into words about the things that I have gone through as a teacher. I love teaching, I really do. Kids nowadays are the same in how I think when I was their age, but the things they do and HOW they do it is totally different! I used to smoke and think about tattoos and music and booze when I was their age, now they go beyond all of that... I guess changes are permanent.. One thing for sure, at that age, they still can't think of what's best for them, exactly how I was back then...

I love them too much to hate them.. I do get angry and sometimes I shout, I whack them and I say hurtful things, I threatened them in any ways possible, but deep down inside, I can still feel this weird feeling inside of me. Love and the sense of responsibility as their educator, their mother, their friend. I can't explain why, i just feel it in my gut. I am constantly hoping that I will have this fire burning forever...Striving to give the best to them even when I know, they won't accept it sometimes. I want to give, give and give, teach, teach and teach. (this is so corny eh) hehehe

to be continued....